The Best Damn Banana Bread Ever

I know; it’s a strong statement but I stand by my claim. My banana bread recipe is the best. Yummy factor – exceeds all measurable expectations. My recipe is below. Nutritional info? Don’t know; don’t care. There is nothing healthy about this recipe. It was designed to be yummy, and to be a treat. Why do I make this delicious potential gastronomic heart attack? Because life is short and while we should all make healthy eating a priority, sometimes you just gotta say “to hell with it!” and enjoy it to the last yummy crumb.

What you need

  1. 1 cup of maple sugar
  2. 1 stick of unsalted butter
  3. 2 large organic eggs
  4. 3 bananas
  5. 1 teaspoon of salt
  6. 1 teaspoon of cinnamon
  7. 1 tablespoon of unsweetened vanilla almond milk
  8. 1 teaspoon of vanilla bean paste
  9. 1 teaspoon of vanilla
  10. 1 teaspoon of baking powder
  11. 1 teaspoon of baking soda
  12. Cinnamon sugar – enough for dusting
  13. 2 cups of organic unbleached flour
  • Here we go! First set your oven temperature to 325 degrees Fahrenheit and let it preheat.
  • In medium bowl mash up 3 bananas with a fork. The more ripe your bananas are the sweeter and better the flavor of the bread will be. Add the cinnamon, milk, and vanilla. Gross! Don’t worry, we’ll get there. Now, in another bowl you need to combine your sugar and butter. Beat them with a hand mixer on a high speed until nice and creamy. Once you have a creamy mixture add your eggs one at a time while continuing to mix. Once your eggs are combined with the butter and sugar, add your vanilla bean paste
  • Mix until smooth and creamy
  • Now set this bowl aside and get another one. Yes, another bowl! I probably should have mentioned you will have a sink full of dirty dishes when you’re done making this, but again, it’s worth it. I promise.
  • Now, in your third bowl you will combine all your dry ingredients. I like to use a whisk to blend them together
  • Congratulations! Phase 1 is complete. Now it’s time to put everything together. I start by combining the wet mixture with the banana mixture
  • I don’t use the hand mixer anymore from this point on. I fold the banana mixture into the wet mixture and continue folding until I get this disgusting lumpy mess. Don’t give up on me yet! I swear this bread will be delicious.
  • Once all the wet stuff is put together I add the dry ingredients. This part is messy. You need to fold in the dry ingredients without splashing flour all over the damn kitchen. I’d tell you how to do that but I haven’t mastered it myself yet. Anyway, you want to mix until you get a sticky, lumpy, mess that looks a little bit like vomit.
  • Don’t stop reading! I swear on my mother’s grave you will want to make this bread every weekend.
  • Okay, your batter is ready so now it’s time to get your bread dish prepped. I like the Pyrex glass bread dish. Grease up the inside of your bread dish with unsalted butter. Do not use butter flavor vegetable shortening because…ewww! Once your dish is greased up we’ll dump in some cinnamon sugar and shake it around the dish so it coats the inside completely.
  • It should look like this. Now, before we go on let’s talk about the cinnamon sugar. I use a blend from the Alden Spice Shop in Alden Michigan. I buy nearly all my spices there because 1) They grind their spices in house 2) I love using Michigan made products, and 3) I’m passionate about supporting local businesses.
  • Now that your bread dish is ready it’s time to dump in the batter. It’s a lumpy sticky mess. I use a butter knife to try and smooth the top out but then I remember that I am not Martha Stewart (full disclosure- I’m usually sipping on a cherry martini while making this and vodka can be a very convincing liar). Sprinkle some cinnamon sugar on top
  • And now we’re ready for the oven! Set the timer on your phone for 1 hour and 10 minutes.
  • Now, make yourself s cocktail and find someone to wash all those dishes and clean the kitchen for you.
  • Before I show you the finished product I want to show you some of the ingredients I use.
  • I buy almost all my spices, seasonings, rubs, and mixes from Alden’s. If you’re near Alden Michigan I highly recommend you visit their charming little spice shop. If you’re not they have a website you can google and they do sell their spices on Amazon. My go to is their Miracle Blend.
  • I take my choice in vanilla seriously! Absolutely NO imitation vanilla is allowed in my kitchen. I love a good Mexican vanilla but I used mine all up. My go to is Nielsen Massey Madagascar vanilla. I buy the liquid and the paste. The combination packs a punch!
  • When I listed maple sugar you probably thought to yourself huh? Well, here it is. I buy this stuff from local maple syrup producers at local farmers markets. This tastes oh…so…much…better than processed, refined white sugar. Whenever a recipe calls for sugar I replace with this. I am not a nutritionist. I have no idea how much better/worse this is than store bought white sugar. I just know the flavor is amazing and it makes your cookie and banana bread recipes that much yummier. Is yummier really a word? I don’t know. But next time you make chocolate chip cookies swap this in for the white sugar along with the brown sugar and oh…my…god.
  • Okay, so this has nothing to do with banana bread. It’s what I use to make my cherry martinis. Now, full disclosure. I am not being paid to endorse any of these products. In fact, I’m hoping these businesses don’t sue me for mentioning their product without permission! I am not against monetizing a blog, especially mine which someday I will do. But, integrity matters. I will never promote a product or service I have not used and do not believe in.
  • But enough about that. Once the bread has been in the oven about 45 minutes it should start to smell heavenly. It does need the hour and 10 to bake. Using 3 bananas keeps it moist and you want it to bake through completely. When it’s ready remove it from the oven
  • This is what success looks like. Try to let it cool a bit. Honestly, my family and friends are usually hovering around me holding a butter knife when I take it out of the oven so I usually pop it out of the pan right away. I schmear a pat of butter on a slice and serve.
  • Bob appetit!
  • A final word, yes you could add walnuts if you really wanted to. I hate walnuts in banana bread so I leave them out. I know you will love this. Enjoy!
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